The claims incels put forward have been debunked over and over and over again by both men and women. The astounding amount of evidence that disproves everything they have said has just grown and grown and still nothing changes on their end. The average married man is not conventionally attractive. Conventionally unattractive people get into relationships everyday. But no, deaf ears.

As for the dehumanization that they now experience (and correct, after being the ones to do the dehumanization all this time.) I'm not a fan of dehumanizing anyone, let's start there. But as for their community, the most succinct analysis of their behaviors and their language is outlined here:

https://arxiv.org/pdf/2105.12006

It's "The Incel Lexicon" by Gothard et al. A team of researchers from University of Vermont actually spent years sitting there deciphering the entire incel ideology and community to come up with this, for want of a better word, guidebook. A 'how to' guide to dealing with incels and their behaviour and speech patterns.

Read this from a civilian's point of view. The ideology, the terminology, the iconography, the different levels of pilling, the insane world they've built for themselves that exists in their own heads. It's a cult. How does anyone interact with a group like this and remind themselves that they're dealing with actual humans? My country has even designated them officially as a new form of domestic terrorism so let that sink in.

This community doesn't deserve to be demonized or dehumanized. But the absolute last thing this community needs is sympathy.